Quarter Life Crisis

I can hear the clock ticking inside my head.

I am turning 25, soon. The last time I wrote a blog is more than a year ago. Recalling those times, I was so spirited, only 23 years old and turning 24. Have you even wondered if numbers ever make a difference to ones age? If you ask me, I'd say yes! Despite botox and your trusty plastic surgeon, the numbers don't lie!!

When I think of someone who is young and entitled to carelessness in his/her life, i think someone who is 24 years old... or under. It is such a nice number and perfect age to be. At 24, you have just gotten over your teenage self and finally get used to being a young adult and society. You are fresh faced and full of hope. You still have great plans... one which my included world domination. Then soon enough (and time really flies when you are 24), you turn 25 (*screams!!!).

When you turn 25, the romantics of being a young individual entitled to careless and carefreeness ENDS! It just do.

Being 25 is old. Not like geriatrics old... but more so you-are-responsible-for-your-life old. When you tell someone you are 25, they will be thinking 'oh you must be independent now, working professional who is saving for a property, paying off your car and planning to get married in the next 4 years tops'. Lol, at least that is what I would think, so someone should shoot me in the head cos I am no where near there.

At 25, some may say that I facing a quarter life crisis. I think I prefer the idea that I am just doing a reality check. Well, in case you are wondering what I had been babbling all about, this is my situation:

After living in Melbourne for almost 10 years, I have decided to move back to Jakarta for good. The irony is that it is a completely unplanned decision and I just got back from Jakarta 4 days a after a 3 months.... retreat/ retirement. I left my previous job (where I werked-it for 2.5 years) and came back to Melbourne with the hopes of embarking on a new adventure.

Alas, I realised that in the 10 years that I have been living in Melbourne, the number of times I was truly happy are few. I was sad. I am sad. Lonely is probably more accurate. Then I made new friends in this totally new place but they all left Australia soon enough. And it is not just loneliness. It had coupled itself with homesickness, perpetual darkness and coldness thanks to the climate in Melbourne. I realised that I could cope with these quite well..... by spending money on myself to make my life less miserable.

My wish-list runs amok!! If you have read my previous articles, you will be impressed by my retail feat! I have everything!!!! Diamonds, gold, Macbook, 12.5 pixel camera, a whole Gucci store, impressive wardrobe, so much shoes, a whole row of parfums, my trusty Blackberry, new this, new that. It got up to the point that a $7000 watch is nothing to me!! Somebody has to stop me!!! I am not a materialistic person by nature. I buy all these things not because I like to show them off... in fact, I rarely bring them out in front of people. I buy them to make myself happy. It is my way to loving myself. The result: NIL SAVINGS!!

So there I am, 2 days in Melbourne and decided that there is nothing here in Australia for me. If I am unhappy and have no savings... why am I still here? Note that I am turning 25 and at 25, one assumes to be 'oh you must be independent now, working professional who is saving for a property, paying off your car and planning to get married in the next 4 years tops'.

There is still hope for me! I am a month and a bit away from 25!! I can still make it! I can still become independent, a working professional who is saving a property, paying off my first car and will be married in 4 years (or 6 years as I have given myself).

Wish me luck people. I shall update more often. And please God, let 25 be kind to me =).